365 days to your richest life: day 13
Once we create order in our financial lives, our anxiety will diminish a great deal, but it won’t disappear entirely — not unless we retreat to Walden’s Pond. The more we expose ourselves to environmental stresses, the more time we need to invest in treating our anxiety. Modern living requires us to counteract the stresses of modern life through active self-care — and accepting that fact allows us both to treat the anxiety that we are currently experiencing and to shore up our strength against future challenges.
Just as importantly, we must come to understand that anxiety does not indicate that there is a terrible problem lurking somewhere.
I have spent a great deal of time over the last five years listening to the “still, small voice” of my higher self, and one thing that has become crystal clear is that it never speaks from a place of fear. As Reverend Marvin Anderson used to say, the voice of God is always a Yes! Your divine self is a point of awareness in the ultimate, infinite positive. If you are hearing a voice that says, “If you do that you’ll fail spectacularly and have to declare bankruptcy and even your mother will think you’re a fool” that is not your highest self speaking. That is the voice of anxiety. The only truth it signals is that it is time to treat your anxiety through self-care.
So, let go of that particular myth. Your anxiety is not trying to warn you that you’re about to move in the wrong direction. It is warning you not to move at all, not to grow, not to reach toward your potential. It is warning you to ’stay safe’ by resisting change. (Since change is the one constant, resisting change is ultimately always a waste of precious energy and time.)
Never attempt to treat anxiety by attempting to solve the problems that anxiety attaches itself to. I find that it’s very helpful to treat anxious thoughts like upset toddlers. Reasoning with anxiety is a waste of time — distraction is the only real solution. Do whatever it is that best distracts you (unless that activity is also anxiety-provoking). Go for a long walk, see a funny movie, meditate, make yourself a nice cup of tea and re-read a favourite book. Get a baby sitter if you have young children, and take a hot bath or a nap. Stop everything — and treat the anxiety.
Why is this important? First, because acting from a place of anxiety is the least effective way to overcome any real challenges we face. Any decision made from a place of fear is very likely to be a bad decision.
Let’s recap. First, we rid ourselves of our anxiety magnets by creating order in our financial life — then, we treat any environmental anxiety on a regular basis.
And if that doesn’t work, if we are still uncomfortable, it is safe to conclude that we are suffering from divine discontent. That means that we must change our lives. For the primary difference between divine discontent and anxiety is that divine discontent spurs us to action — while anxiety keeps us in inaction.
Self-actualization, living our best life, determining our purpose and reaching our divine potential requires that we take risks. So, first we treat our environmental anxiety. Then we embrace our divine discontent, and harness it — we use it to lift us off the couch, to create a defense against those in our lives who are afraid of losing us if we become our best selves.
Frank X. Barron was a scholar who spent his life exploring the creative mind. And just to be clear about what we are talking about here, know that everyone who ever succeeded at anything, from art to business to motherhood, did so because they engaged their creative mind. Sometimes the only art we engage in is the creation of our own lives, and it might be argued that the creation of our lives is the greatest masterpiece of all.
Dr. Barron wrote that “Creativity requires taking what Einstein called “a leap into the unknown”. This can mean putting your beliefs, reputation and resources on he line as you suffer the slings and arrows of ridicule.”
During more than 20 years in the world of finance, I have identified a number of traits that separate those that succeed from those who only dream of succeeding. Successful people don’t wait until they feel safe before they take action. They don’t let their fear paralyze them — instead, they harness that fear to motivate them to do their best.